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the garages suck

by the garages

/
1.
hell yeah we're the garages slept for ten years, now we suck again whoa-oh, whoa-oh i betcha thought we’d gotten better but nothin’ ever gets better round here whoa-oh, whoa-oh yeah we’re sorry to disappoint but that’s always been the point yeah we’re sorry to disappoint but honestly we never cared what you thought about us we’ll suck forever we don’t even give a shit we’ll suck forever i hope we never get a hit we’ll suck forever we don’t even give a shit about what you think and i’m pretty sure that’s what punk rock means success is for capitalists so every time we fail it’s basically praxis whoa-oh, whoa-oh who cares about the bottom line we’re on a one way ticket to party time whoa-oh, whoa-oh yeah we’re sorry to disappoint but i think you’re missing the point yeah we’re sorry to disappoint but what’d you expect from a bunch of cranky anarchists we’ll suck forever yeah we’re losers to the end we’ll suck forever and then we’ll party with our friends we’ll suck forever even if we sweep the playoffs and ascend yeah we’ll kill the gods, and we’ll still suck then and if the boss tries to keep us down we’ll flip her off from the dugout grounds yeah we’re sorry to disappoint but that’s always been the point yeah we’re sorry to disappoint but honestly who gives a shit what you think about us we’ll suck forever I hope we never ever win we’ll suck forever yeah we’re losers till the end we’ll suck forever because you can’t make us care about what you think and I’m pretty sure that’s what “punk rock” means. (well, that and punching nazis. those two things.)
2.
we’re back waking up heading out to see the light of a new sun feels like it’s been years still the memories of loss and pain are ringing in my ears we’re not normally the ones whose names you see but we’re here we’re here we’ll place our bets on you we’re gonna help you see this through and though we may be far away you always know that come day one or ninety nine the finals or in party time we’ll ride the vibes no matter what and if tomorrow brings the end of all we’ve seen raising hell or tearing down peace we’re gonna be there things sure look different now new stadiums are going up houses of cards built to fall down time seems to slow a bit we’re getting breaks but they’re unpaid just quick enough to grab a bag of chips but even in the stress, my friends if you need them, we’ve got helping hands and we’re here we’re here we’ll place our bets on you we’re gonna help you see this through and though we may be far away you always know that come day one or ninety nine the finals or in party time we’ll ride the vibes no matter what and if tomorrow brings the end of all we’ve seen raising hell or tearing down peace we’re gonna be there we know we’re not the ones who have to fear the breaking dawn our sky is slowly burning but the tides are surely turning and we promise you this much that we will face down any god who still wants to tear us down we’ll be beside you rushing up the mound we’ll place our bets on you we’re gonna help you see this through and though we may be far away you always know that come day one or ninety nine the finals or in party time we’ll ride the vibes no matter what and if tomorrow brings the end of all we’ve seen raising hell or tearing down peace pockets full or begging for seeds you can know we’ll always be we’re gonna be there
3.
I keep losing all my coins for betting on the winning team cause horrid venture capitalists placed their bets on our league buying overpriced stale popcorn, cold hot dogs, too salty seeds Oh It makes me wonder who’s mouth will I really feed so show the Boss who’s boss by letting her refund the cost we can break some shit and take some shit for everyone we’ve lost flip that boss off your back as we prepare for the attack we won't have to wonder when we’ll take back our league
4.
why’d you have to wake me up? i've got an empty coffee cup and now you say we have to play? can’t we sleep for one more day? i’ll do what i can, but i need rest i’ll give it my all, but not my best and frankly i don’t think we’re gonna win we’re gonna lose yeah we’re gonna lose and that’s okay because at least we get experience, and we get a chance to play and when it’s time to make concessions to calm the coming storm at least we won’t be hungry while we’re eating stale popcorn so many books i wanted to read but I’ve barely read the first so many friends i meant to catch up with but I didn’t, i’m the worst I couldn’t sleep, I barely napped i feel tired, and i still feel trapped but, hey, i guess we’re doing this again we’re gonna lose yeah we’re gonna lose and that’s alright and they’ve even scheduled breaks for us since we don’t sleep at ight and if we have to sell our peanuts to keep our pockets warm at least we won’t be hungry because we’re eating stale popcorn e’re gonna lose yeah we’re gonna lose but we’ll be fine now they’ve fully stocked the brand-new shop and we don’t have to ait in line so thee’s no need to worry and no need to be forlorn there’s nothing more delicious than a feast of stale popcorn we’re gonna lose yeah we’re gonna lose and that’s okay and if we win the playoffs, we’ll lose again some day but we don’t need your pity don’t look at us with scorn we’ve got everything we need in a bag of stale popcorn
5.
season 12, we emerged from the same locker rooms, to the same damn fields got on the same uniform as a decade ago and on the way home, tot and i, we grab coffee and i look out at seattle, how much is different how much is the same there’s a dog barking in the neighbour’s yard that’s been barking for the last ten years nothing has changed, and i want to get over all the nights i spent in houston when i went to the bay and threw in a penny and wished that we could bring her back nothing has changed, and i want to get over all the nights we spent in houston when we went to the top of the bleachers and yelled “tiana, you were gone too soon” my room-mate has this poster up “come to the show, 23rd of July, 1994” no-one remembers that year and i’m trying to remember if i ever enjoyed this my arm’s getting tired, and my back’s getting sore from travelling cross-country a hundred days in a row there’s a dog barking in the neighbour’s yard that’s been barking for the last ten years nothing has changed, and i want to get over all the nights i spent in houston when i went to the bay and threw in a penny and wished that we could bring her back nothing has changed, and i want to get over all the nights we spent in houston when we went to the top of the bleachers and yelled “tiana, you were gone too soon” nothing has changed, and i want to get over all the nights i spent in houston we laid down a bunch of flowers and flew out the following day nothing has changed, and i want to get over all the nights we spent in houston you were trying to pass it off by sayin’ “tiana, you were gone too soon”

credits

released March 8, 2021

we'll suck forever by Mother Love Blone (noise-land.bandcamp.com), backing vocals by The Suckettes.
the return, part 2 by zack.ry (zackry.bandcamp.com, sigfigscollective.com), with contributions from various members of the Blaseball community.
flip off the coin by June September (juneseptember.bandcamp.com)
stale popcorn by VigilantBaker (vigilantbaker.bandcamp.com), lead guitar by Neil Bickford (neilbickford.bandcamp.com), group vocals by amadis (@amadis), BONES (@jbonechristian), fourthmountain, Rana (colrana.bandcamp.com), and Navigator Riley (@StarryNavigator)
nothing has changed by rain (rainrain.bandcamp.com), with lead guitar by Mother Love Blone (noise-land.bandcamp.com)

- - -

The Suckettes are:
Ada (@recombinatrix)
Beo (@EmIsLongForM)
BONES (@jbonechristian)
Emu Mosh Veteran
jennifer cat (@CattiferJen)
June September
Levi Squier (@SquierVoices)
Mechtroid (@mechtroid)
MQ (@QueenMucus)
Navigator Riley (@StarryNavigator)
rain (rainrain.bandcamp.com)
Razura (@DesertQubeley)
riley
Sven “keeper_notes” Michel (@svensationalism)
Tora Borealis (Exceptional Feline)
Two-Headed Butt (twoheadedbutt.bandcamp.com)
yana (@villainousgoo, going-nowhere.bandcamp.com )
zack.ry (zackry.bandcamp.com, sigfigscollective.com )

- - -

mottos provided by:

Baltimore Crabs
autumn (autumnspring.bandcamp.com)

Boston Flowers
CottonCandyFluff

Breckenridge Jazz Hands
@HoneyFox_

Canada Moist Talkers
zack.ry

Charleston Shoe Thieves
valuminumbandit

Chicago Firefighters
summerdeaf

Dallas Steaks
yana (@villainousgoo, going-nowhere.bandcamp.com )

Hades Tigers
Levi Squier (@SquierVoices)
@recombinatrix

Hawai’i Fridays
@MaliceAmidst
Sara (@draconianl4w)

Houston Spies
rosie

Hellmouth Sunbeams
kelsey fin
@orionexperiment, orionexperiment.tumblr.com
amadis

Kansas City Breathmints
athena
Theo (@agaricandmoss)

Mexico City Wild Wings
FIVEpoint9
Hernshaw (@clowdersiege)
Lily Jones (@ClaudiaVice)

Miami Dale
Astrid Dalmady (@dastridly, AstridDalmady.com)
LT (@shittygomu)
Terrified Volleyball Dad (@heptameride)
June September

New York Millennials
DuckTapeAl

Philadelphia Pies
rosie

San Francisco Lovers
AWildHannahAppeared (@HannahAppeared)
@linktm

Seattle Garages
teganeden, tonalchroma.bandcamp.com
Jasper )@DapperCuttlefish#9823)
Sven "keeper_notes" Michel (@svensationalism on Twitter)
neen lancaster (neen-lancaster.itch.io)
Rana (colrana.bandcamp.com)
zack.ry

Tokyo Lift
emily june (@emilyjunemusic, emilyjunemusic.bandcamp.com)

Unlimited Tacos
@oswiniarty

Yellowstone Magic
Monthenor
Yearly (@latenightecho)

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about

the garages Seattle, Washington

if you want an album for free, for any reason, email thegarages@fourth-strike.com

we are the garages, an anarcho-syndicalist blaseball band from the fictional location of seattle. we make songs about being gay, the apocalypse, and fighting the gods. ... more

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